is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
