Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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