What did we do last night that was yellow?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
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