Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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