i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize