do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Just pee around me
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
