People in love make me want to vomit
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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