Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
