after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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