so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize