call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Randomize
