16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
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