I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
