No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
