And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
