And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
