If i come over, it means nothing
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize