To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
