Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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