is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
