Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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