So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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