Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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