Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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