By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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