so explain again why im purple
no
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
