we have pet lesbian snakes
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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