When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
How's work?
Spinning.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
