well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
