how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding๐
Good news!! I can adult!! ๐ turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ๐ญ๐
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