I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
The air was thick with penises
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
