JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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