His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
do herpes really smell.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I just had sex on a roof
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
