I accidentally burped into my bong.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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