Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
