...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
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