there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
