I showed him my bush... on skype.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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