Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize