Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize