remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
