yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
