So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
