We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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