Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
handjob tips. give me some.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
