I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I just blew my weed a kiss
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
