I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
