Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
