Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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