We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
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